My Bio as My Story

It is April 11 and I'm so happy to be back at my blog!  I'm probably having the busiest Spring ever, so I've let my blogging slide- and I miss it!

 Where I've been focusing my writing energy the most these days is in rewriting my bio.  It's been such an interesting process for me.  Months or rewrites!  First it was for my own website, and then it was for the TeleSummit site.  I can't believe how many drafts I've been through at this point - from over a page to just a paragraph.  My TeleSummit bio has been up for a couple months, and I recently decided to rewrite it.  Realized there's more I could say.

I've been scared about putting myself out there in a more vulnerable way, but also wanting to do that, to come out as who I truly am and what I've been through.  Ready to stop hiding.  And this TeleSummit, where I'm getting interviewed about how yoga has transformed my life on April 23, created the perfect opportunity to look deeper at my journey.

I've been unsure of what exactly I wanted to share, how to keep it simple and concise.  Lots of questions like:  What's important?  What's boasting?  Who am I really?  What do I have to offer?  How can I best describe what I do?  What have I actually learned along the way?  How has yoga changed my life?  What do I want people to know about me?  How can this be of service? 

So it's been quite poignant, like diving into my life story. The funniest thing is that in the course I'm currently co-teaching with Karen Harris and Therese Fitz-Maurice, we are asking people to write up their stories, either whole life story or a story that needs some healing, with the idea that working on the story and sharing it, does bring healing.  So this is, in effect, what I've been doing anyway.  And along with my Hendricks training, and my commitment to being authentic and transparent, I'm really taking this bio into new and vulnerable territory. 

I've realized that my story of insecurity and low self-esteem is big.  It's been a huge player and driving force in my life, creating my big Perfectionist persona, who tries to protect me from pain and loss, as well as the Driver, who's always pushing to accomplish things in the world. I can see how much healing I've done in this area, and there's more, and it's still my story.  I have recognized that I'm not alone in this, of course, and it's still my story.  I think my owning this aspect of myself and being willing to share it with others actually helps me to embrace all of myself, actually helps me detach from the story of "I'm not worthy, I'm not enough" and claim that this story and my journey with it are my gifts instead of my faults.  And I get empowered by sharing them.  WOW!  It's totally the opposite of the pattern of hiding them because I feel ashamed.  How about stepping up and sharing them and then I feel powerful and strong and hardly feel their pull on me anymore! 

And I know by lots of recent experiences now, that me sharing this and letting others see into me, into-me-see = intimacy (thanks to Marc Takaha for that one), that I become more connected to people, which is what I really want anyway.  AND,  this is completely the opposite of what happens if I hide or pretend to be something I'm not!  And I also see that coming forward with my story can also be of service to others who are hiding behind their own wall of shame.   In fact, I feel so pumped up by this process, that I just want to get on my soapbox and tell everyone to stand up and share something they've never shared before, tell their loved ones their darkest secrets, tell a friend something they've been withholding, and let yourself be seen and held in all of who you are! 

So this is where I see my teaching going, and it already has, in workshops, in retreats, long term courses like the one I'm dong with Karen:  helping people to own, to share their stories, to embrace themselves, their true essence, to be seen and let go of the armoring that keeps those stories hidden.  (Of course the deeper unfolding may take longer, but this is where my personal coaching practice can help, or some other modality).  I believe it's our hiding, our trying to disown part of ourselves, our trying to be somebody that we're not, that holds us back from living the life we truly want to live.  Hiding is pent-up energy.  Revealing is releasing energy!

Okay, I'm super excited now.  Thanks for reading this far.  I'll come back to this thread later.  But for now, here's my latest TeleSummit bio:  super brief for the website, but hopefully, it encapsulates some of what I've shared.  I love your feedback!
Namaste,
Robyn

Robyn Smith, owner of Inner Freedom Yoga in Arcata, CA,  is a certified Anusara yoga instructor, Hanna Somatic Educator, and Hendricks Conscious Living and Loving coach.  She's been teaching yoga for over 18 years, helping people with chronic pain and tension since 1998, and engaging in conscious communication and healthy lifestyle practices since she was 20.  She's in awe of yoga's power to transform all aspects of life and her teachings offer empowering messages of love and healing. 

Having struggled with early loss and a teenage eating disorder, she's no stranger to self hatred and deep insecurity.  With growing self esteem and confidence over the last 25 years, she has come to know that her essence is wholeness, and she's committed to loving herself and experiencing radiant self esteem all the time.

Robyn is a champion for living the life you love.  Through her teaching and coaching, she helps people reclaim their bodies, live from their hearts, and celebrate their true essence.  She delights in gardening, nature hikes, and growing community through parties, long courses and retreats.  

Responding to Tragedy

Yesterday I found myself weeping while listening to NPR's story about the Connecticut elementary school shooting.  What a horrific tragedy.  My heart goes out to the parents and families of the children and teachers who were killed.  The scope of their grief is unimaginable to me.

My response has been deep sadness, anger and confusion.  And the part of me that wants to fix it, prevent it, says:  What can I do to help?  How can I make a difference?   While I do believe that serious gun control regulations could make a difference, I also think that people who commit such violence would come up with other means to express their feelings  if they couldn't get guns.  I think the root of the problem starts early, with families, child-rearing, and social pressures.  So while I'll do my part with gun control, I'm more passionate about sourcing the root of the issue.  And I realize it's incredibly complex, from media influences to drugs, to family issues and mental illness.

Questions arise like:  What makes people want to commit such horrific acts?  Why and how did they learn that violence was the best way to handle their feelings?  What happens inside of them to drive them to such measures?  As one of my teachers said, everything that people do is because they think they need to do it in order to survive.  

Almost two decades of teaching yoga and spiritual practices has shown me that the greatest human suffering we face is related to our emotions.   We want to be happy and don't have skillful training in how to express ourselves or how to get our needs met.  We are told (especially for women) that it's not okay to express our anger or (usually for men) our sadness.  And we either bottle it up and let it make us sick, or we lash out at ourselves or others in some way.  We feel separate and alone because we forget our inner light, that we're ultimately all the same on the inside and want the same thing: happiness.

So I've been studying various communication skills and spiritual practices because I want to help myself and others with this emotional suffering and confusion.   I want to learn and teach people skillful means for self expression and self-honoring, and how to see the love and beauty in themselves and in each other.  Through my recent foray into the Hendricks' work,  I'm discovering how to love myself more fully, finding the courage to express myself authentically, and learning how to coach others in doing the same.   It's another level of my yoga practice, a powerful and sometimes terrifying journey of exploration, and one that I'm deeply committed to for it's great rewards. 

I'm enjoying bringing this work forward into my weekly classes and longer courses, like Awakening the Voice of the Heart, and eventually I plan to coach individuals, couples and groups.  But when tragedies like this hit, or when I hear stories about long-term prisoners who've committed murder, theft, rape or abuse and lost 20+ good years of life because of deep suffering and emotional outbursts, I imagine taking this work out where it can have the greatest impact:  to children, parents, teachers and prisoners.   

I pray that we can live in a society where we know and love ourselves enough to share our true feelings, have the courage to ask for what we want, and can see the light within and in everyone we meet.   

Many Solstice Blessings to you,
Robyn

Essence and Authentic Self-Expression

I've had a great time exploring the concept of Essence in my classes over the last two weeks.  It came up from studying the Hendricks' work and they talk about living from your Essence.  For them, Essence is who you really are, like who you are at the core, behind your foibles and ego constructs.  I like to think of Essence as in flower essence, as in the concentrated form of You when you're distilled down to the most pure qualities of yourself.  So I've been thinking of it as a very personal flavor of Essence, ie. my Robynness.  Like how much could I remove and still be me?   Like what is my most authentic form of me?  I love this contemplation.  I love to think of a new born baby and how they are so pure, and yet they very definitely have an Essence, a nature that is unique to them.  We know that this never changes.  We can look in the mirror year after year, and though the outer form keeps changing, there's something inside that feels very much the same.  From Essence, we're drawn to certain types of people, environments, textures, activities; we experience the world from a certain perspective, move at a certain pace.  

I think the goal of our yoga practice is to take us back to the experience of this Essence within, our purest form, before it got layered on with beliefs, stories, catastrophes, ego development, etc.  And how does it feel to be in our Essence?  As Marc Takaha said today in our interview about his upcoming Conscious Loving workshop, when you're in Essence, you have a feeling effortlessness, ease, and pleasure.  It's an experience, not a mental concept.  So, as I see it, you're embodied presence when you're in your Essence.  Movement can take you there, especially conscious movement like yoga and ecstatic dancing.  Meditation can also take you there, as can doing the Hendricks' relationship work.

What I'm learning from the Hendricks is very much like the Yoga of Relationships, as I've been calling it lately, because in their work, we are trying to uncover Essence, fully know it, and then live from this place, and this is exactly what we're doing in Yoga.  In Tantrik philosophy, Yoga is about knowing your true Self as Divine Consciousness and letting it shine through your full expression.  So our Essence is then both our unique personal flavor as well as a Universal presence that ties us all together.    In yoga, it may also be called Essence, but other names are Self, Divine Consciousness, Shiva/Shakti, Spanda, and more.   And if we can live from this experience of Being, as Ekhart Tolle calls it, then not only can we feel more free and alive, but we can also relate to others and the world from this place.  

I think of this as living in alignment with what's true; living authentically.   This is the practice of yoga on the mat as well as off the mat.  For example, if I'm in yoga class and honoring my Essence if what's true for me is that I love gardening, I love dancing, I love studying, resting in the sunshine and deeply connecting to nature, and I'm not doing those things on a regular basis, then I am not living in alignment with who I am.  I'm avoiding it. in denial or not tuning in, etc., and I will not be resonating at a high frequency.  I will not be thriving.   So living from Essence is living your Yoga.

According to Tantrik philosophical teachings, the Divine Consciousness chooses to express itself through each of us, and it's will/desire, known as iccha, is for each of us to then fully express ourselves so it can know itself more fully.  This is known as lila, the Divine Play.  In fact, it chooses diversity by creating each of us to be totally unique from each other, including beings and things, because with more diversity, there can be a greater range of expressions and then more possible self-knowing.   This is very close to what the Hendricks are teaching, as far as I understand it, with the addition of many wonderful nuances and techniques to support skillful our expression through conscious communication, movement, play, etc.  

So this work of sourcing truth, feeling into Essence and then letting it be expressed, is what I've been teaching in classes, and it's been really fun.  It's really the perfect pulsation of inner and outer.  Turn inwards to know the truth, and then open outwards and let it shine as your unique individual expression!  

I'm on a super fun journey of doing both these things, continually refining my understanding and experience of who I really am and exploring how I want to express this in my own unique way.   

I so appreciate all of you who are along for the ride and I'm super excited to gain more skills so I can support you in stepping more fully into your unique expression of You!  

On that note, I want to encourage you to check out the free interview I just finished with Marc Takaha who I mentioned earlier.   We discussed his long background in the Hendricks work and his upcoming workshop in Arcata called The Art of Conscious Loving on Sunday, November 11.  If you listen to the whole call, you'll hear the special offer at the end, but you must act by October 29.  You can listen to the call at this number:  (641) 715-3800 passcode: 34279, extension 23 or download it to your computer at this link: 

https://www.dropbox.com/s/594q0sv56p625be/Marc%20Takaha%20Interview%2010_23_12.mp3

You can find out more about Marc's upcoming workshop and sign up online here:

http://innerfreedomyoga.com/workshops.php#marc

You can find more about other upcoming interview calls here on my website:

 http://www.innerfreedomyoga.com/teleconference.html

I hope to see you soon,

Robyn

The Receptivity of Studentship

I've had a great week of teaching this theme which is dear to my heart.  Last weekend, I had the pleasure of meeting Dan John, who is a creative master in his field of weight training for athletes and special military forces.  Dan is also an Olympic-class athlete and a Highland Games champion.  He is in his prime, traveling the world sharing his foundational system for fitness and strength training.  Patrick has been training with one of his students here in Arcata and feels stronger and more fit than he has  in the last 11 years.

What I appreciated the most about Dan was his receptivity, humility, curiosity and honesty.  He was interested in yoga, and liked the little lesson he got from Patrick, so I offered to teach him a full private lesson before he left on Monday and he was thrilled.   He was a wonderful student;  he took notes, asked great questions, and earnestly tried to implement everything I offered him, which was a lot!  He wanted to know all about the 5 Universal Principles of Alignment of Anusara Yoga, and loved the three A's of Attitude, Alignment and Action.  

I was reflecting later that with all his knowledge, I was quite impressed at his great humility and curiosity as my student.  He was completely receptive and open to all I had to say,  like water receives salt, he took it and let it mix inside of him.  In our yoga school, when we discuss studentship, or what it means to be a good student, receptivity is high on the list.   As the Dalai Lama says, if you're already a full cup, then anything that gets poured in, just spills over; it has no where else to go.   In order to receive, you must empty yourself out and let somebody else, or the teachings, or your experiences, fill you up.  Dan was a great model for this, considering he was so full already of such great wisdom and experience, he could have come to me with a full cup or a strong ego ready to tell me how his method was just as good, impress me with his own facts, etc.  But instead, he emptied himself out so he could let me fill him up.  And it was fun.  

A great teacher must be a great student and I could see that in Dan.  He wouldn't be where he is today without his dedicated studentship.  When we are receptive and open to receiving from others, we can then integrate what is offered into our own experience and understanding.  And I have a hunch this is what Dan will do.  

These qualities of receptivity, humility and curiosity are also paramount in our intimate relationships.   When we are given feedback, if we can fully listen and cultivate wonder (adbutha), then we can ask more questions instead of thinking we have all the answers.  We can open ourselves to the possibility of learning from what we're given instead of closing down with defensiveness or anger.  If we immediately defend or think we have the answers, then our cup is full and there is no intimacy, no connection, no room for growth, just a shield.  

May you cultivate receptivity, humility and curiosity.  May you become a great student of your own mind, of relationship, and of life.  And may all being benefit.

Namaste,

Robyn

The Yoga of Relating

I recently spent 8 days in a Conscious Loving training with Kathlyn Hendricks of the Hendricks Institute. It was so cool to read their books and then meet her and husband, Gay, after having been introduced to their work and books at least 21 years ago in my Heartwood days.   The training was a wonderful blending of the paths I've been exploring for the last many years:  yoga, somatic movement, conscious communication, and more recently, coaching.  For me, it was the yoga of relationships and I found it incredibly enriching.

The main emphasis for me was to take l00 percent responsibility for myself, which includes not blaming or complaining.  This practice showed me places I still wasn't fully taking responsibility even though I'd been practicing it in many areas and had the awareness and intention to do so for many years now.  My awareness of my patterns shot up to a whole new level!  I found it quite fascinating to see that if I'm upset with somebody and wanting to cast blame, for example when somebody doesn't do something they say they're going to do, then instead of blaming or judging, I can choose to look at how my words or actions may have contributed to the situation.  I can inquire about what I can learn from it and how I can communicate more clearly, change my attitude and even the nature of my relationship with them.  So instead of "out-sourcing" my issue to them, I can look at myself and see where I'm responsible.  As they say, we're each 100% responsible for what happens in each of our relationships.

The other big "aha" for me was the awareness and use of commitments, both conscious and unconscious.  The Hendricks say that if we want to find out what we're most committed to, we can simply look at the results we're having in our lives. This may show us some unconscious commitments that we didn't know we had.  For example, I may say that I want to hire a helper, but yet I keep finding reasons or excuses for why I can't do that right now.  So my unconscious commitment is not to have help, to overwork, or to stay in control because that's what's actually happening.  For some, it's around quitting smoking, getting a job, leaving a relationship, losing weight, being late, keeping the house clean, not fighting, etc.  So the idea is that whatever we're committed to energetically, we will produce.  We may be more committed (unconsciously) to staying safe, staying in control, or holding up a certain persona than to making a big change.   So when we realize we're not getting the results we think we want, we then have the opportunity to make a new (and conscious) commitment, ideally supported by concrete action steps, to follow through on our new intentions.

So this is a start to what I'm now exploring, as there are numerous layers to what I learned there.  I'm pretty psyched about seeing how this will unfold for me.  But for now, I'm focusing on my intimate relationships and playing with how I can take more responsibility for my words, actions and thoughts than I ever have before.  This is the yoga of awareness, presence and mindfulness for me. 

9 Easy Tips for Staying Flexible While Traveling

Since I've been traveling so much this Summer and felling challenged to find time for my practices, I wrote up this short article about some of the tricks I've developed to help me stay connected to my body on the road.  I hope you find them useful!

Traveling can be very ungrounding and hard on the body because of all of the hurrying, being away from normal routines, lack of access to healthy foods, changing time zones, and moving at great speeds in planes and cars.  Here are some great ways to get grounded into your body and keep up your flexibility on your next trip:

1- Go to yoga classes!  It's one of my favorite things to do while traveling.  Not only will you get grounded into your body, but you just may find a new pose or new instruction you've never experienced before! 

2 - Every morning, no matter where you are, start you day with about 3 minutes minimum of simple somatic movements like: Reclining pelvic tilts with knees bent (inhale to arch low back, exhale to flatten 10 times gently) or Cat/Cow from the table position (all fours) about 10 times.  This will lubricate your spine and free up your neck and low back.  You can even do it seated while traveling on a plane, train, in the car, etc.

3 - Road Trips:  Make a promise to your self or your travel partner that when you stop at a rest stop, you'll do at least 5 minutes of stretching.  Even better, promise to stop once every 3 hours if you're on a longer trip. Try Side Angle Pose, Warrior 2, Triangle Pose, Wall Push, and Wide Legged Forward Fold with interlaced arms overhead and then a squat for starters.  

4 - Airplanes:  If you find yourself on a long plane ride, make a promise to yourself or your travel partner that you will practice some yoga at the back of the plane or in a quiet corner of the airport.  Try the poses mentioned above.  A shoulder opener (hand on wall and turn your body away from the wall) can also be perfect for the back of the plane.  In your seat, try some simple sitting twists, seated figure four and bend forward (cross one ankle over the opposite knee), and some pranayama and meditation.  More on this coming in a new post….

5 - Layovers in Airports or other stations:  try any of the above suggestions, or better yet, bring a travel mat and roll it out in a corner of the room for a more complete practice with Sun Salutations, standing poses, pigeon pose, a few other hip openers and back bends and reclining hamstring stretches.  Patrick and I have often done this in places like Mexico and Japan, and in general, people will just ignore us and give us space.  Or, even better, they'll check us out and get inspired to do some stretching themselves!

6 - Hotel Rooms: bring a travel mat!  These are light weight and easily fold into your luggage.  Otherwise, use a towel on the floor and commit to at least 10 mins before you start or end your day.

7 - staying with friends or relatives:  tell them about your promise to take care of your body and ask them if they'd like to join you. Ask them to go to a yoga class with you.  Or, tell them you need to spend at least 15 minutes in the morning or before bed doing some asana for yourself.  They'll be inspired. 

8- having guests:  Bring them to your favorite yoga class, or one appropriate to their level.  Or, tell them about your promise to stay connected to your body and invite them to practice at home with you.  They'll probably be very inspired to continue when they leave!

9 - All the time:  remember that when you take the space to care for your mind and body and remember to breathe, you are much more centered and happy with yourself and therefore you're more fun to travel with!

For more ideas about getting grounded on a daily basis, look at my last blog post about "Earthing."

And if you're interested in a free audio download on Rest Stop Yoga and my upcoming free video series on yoga alignment, go to the link to sign up for my monthly newsletter and check to join the list on Upcoming Tele-Courses and Webinars.  In a week or so, you'll get an email with a link to the audio program.  While you're at it, if you'd like to get monthly news about Inner Freedom Yoga events, sign up for the All Yoga Announcements list.  And if you'd only like news about international retreats or workshops or retreats with me in your area, please check those lists.

Please let me know if these tips have been helpful to you!

To your safe and ease-full traveling!

namaste,

Robyn

Get Grounding by Earthing Yourself

How often do you take off your shoes and walk barefoot?  How often do you let your bare skin touch the skin of the earth?  If you're like I was until recently, then it's probably very rare.  But now that I've discovered "Earthing," I'm trying to do it every day.  

Earthing is where you actually put any part of your skin on the surface of the Earth (unsealed concrete or stone also works).  Since I've read the book, Earthing, by Clinton Ober, I've started to garden while barefoot, eat my lunch on the stone patio while barefoot, practice yoga directly on the sand at times, walk on the sand barefoot, make sure my calves and heels are off the towel and on the sand when I'm sunbathing, and yesterday, I even enjoyed a few hours of cruising around at the Humboldt Folklife Festival in my bare feet.   It helps me to feel more connected to my body and to the moment, as I'm forced to slow down and pay more attention to where I step.  I also become more sensitive and aware.  And I feel more grounded and calm, like my inner vibrations slow down.  Plus I'm noticing better sleep.

The Earthing book discusses how the earth's surface is full of free electrons which are negatively charged and how contact with it's surface balances our body's imbalanced positive electrical charge.  So when we get our skin on the earth's skin, we get neutralized. "Earthing naturally protects the body's delicate bioelectircal circuitry against static electrical charges and interference….Earthing remedies an electrical instability and electron deficiency you never knew you had."  

Our problem is that we have spent most of our life not actually touching the earth.  We have rubber or wooden soles on our shoes, carpet, plastic or wood flooring, asphalt on the roads, towels on the sand, blankets on the grass, etc., and free electrons cannot conduct through these surfaces.  But if we put our bare skin on the ground or even on stone or concrete (that's not sealed or painted), we can gain the benefits of Earthing.  At least 30 minutes a day is recommended.  

And what are these benefits?  We not only feel more grounded, centered and relaxed, but many people get benefits like reduced pain and inflammation, increased vitality, better sleep and much more. There are now many studies and testimonials which report decrease in causes of inflammation, increase energy, reduction of stress,  improvement of blood pressure, reduction of muscle tension, headaches, hormonal and menstrual symptoms, increase speed of healing, reduction or elimination of jet lag, protection against EMF's, acceleration of recovery from intense athletic activity, and more.  

So I encourage you to take advantage of this warmer weather and take off your sandals and put your naked feet on the ground! 

Let me know what you discover!